Monday, April 25, 2011

Music Mondays: "Portland, Oregon" by Loretta Lynn (feat. Jack White)

"Well, Portland, Oregon, and sloe gin fizz -- if that ain't love, then tell me what is." -- Loretta Lynn

I'm still on the subject of erotic insanity, but this is a lighter version. "Portland, Oregon," Loretta Lynn's duet with Jack White is a song about getting drunk and getting laid, simple as that. Because of the singers' age difference, I find there's a stronger subtext of the ill-advised sexual connection. At the same time, the warmth of the singing gives the sense that the lovers don't really have regrets.

And a lot of the passion of this song is in White's guitar, which starts on a trippy, Beatles-esque note, and goes on to describe the excitement of stepping foolishly into the unknown.

Friday, April 22, 2011


My new story, "Slowly," is up on Every Night Erotica:

He pressed his forehead against hers and stared into her eyes. His fingertips skimmed the lace surface of her bra, enough to tease but not enough to satisfy. With a groan of frustration, Lyla reached back to undo the bra herself, but Cam stopped her, his hands suddenly iron on her wrists.

“When we were at the restaurant,” he said, “did you tell me to eat my food faster?”

“What do you mean?”

“I want to enjoy you, just like the food we ate. When I chew, I like to do it slowly.”

Again, Cam’s strange, deliberate way sent arousal careening through Lyla’s body. She couldn’t help bucking her hips up against him, only stopping under the calm, heavy weight of his brown gaze. “I want you,” Lyla whispered finally.

“I know. I like that. It makes it more fun to tease you.”

Please check out the rest!

Monday, April 18, 2011

Music Mondays: "Recipe for Disaster" by Morcheeba

"Wanna know why there's a dead guy in my dining room? Hit a dead end with my best friend, met his end too soon." -- Morcheeba

Well, my first post did warn that my taste in sexy music runs dark.

Let's talk sound first. Recipe for Disaster has the smoothest beat, and Skye Edwards has a voice that makes me want to roll around in bed. If you're not listening to the lyrics, you could be forgiven for assuming this is the perfect song to have on while dropping gentle, tender kisses on your lover's lips, building up a slow burn that's going to ignite pretty soon.

In fact, like many Morcheeba songs, the lyrics are quite dark. I believe the song is a play on the classic blues murder ballad tradition. The narrator's found her lover in bed with her best friend, and has taken action.

So, why is the song still sexy? Edwards' croon, which I'm still reacting to the sound of, still conveys a tender, erotic feeling about the man and whatever deed she's done with him--whether sensual or murderous. This is another case of erotic insanity, sexual passion that's grown so that it confuses the meaning of a loving action.

Not a place I'd ever want to be in real life, but Edwards and the rest of the band convey it with powerful seduction.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Lesbian Cops Blog Tour: The Giveaway

I hope you've enjoyed all the posts about Lesbian Cops, both here and on all the participating blogs. By now, if you haven't already read the book, I hope you're dying to do so. Editor Sacchi Green has said that those who leave comments on any of these posts will be entered in a drawing for a copy of the book, so keep that in mind.

But I'd also like to give away a copy of the book. Leave a comment saying why you'd like to read it. I'll pick the one I like best and buy you a copy. You have until 11:59 p.m. Sunday, April 17, to leave your comment--at that point, I'll make my decision.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Music (Lesbian Cops Edition): "Bad Things" by Tricky

"I wanna do bad things and then we're one again." -- Tricky

I've been fascinated by the dark, sexy sound of Tricky's music since the first time I heard it. I can imagine Marleen and Nechama in bed together with his song Bad Things playing. Enjoy!

Lesbian Cops Blog Tour: Excerpt from "A Prayer Before Bed"

Officer Nechama Zayden is taking a statement from Marleen Williams, a witness for a murder case. Marleen is hostile, edgy, and strangely attractive to Nechama.

Nechama blinked and cleared her throat. "I'm very sorry for what you had to see, Ms. Williams," she began.

"Are you?" Marleen challenged. "I'm not like you. I don't get excited dealing with these situations."

"Ms. Williams, I do this because I want to help people, not because I get excited."

"Really?" Marleen's hand darted out and pinched Nechama's left nipple. Nechama had to bite back a yelp that would have been equal parts surprise and arousal. She jumped up from her chair, one hand on her gun.

"You're going to shoot me now?" Marleen said. "I saw your little nipples getting hard when I was talking to you."

Nechama glanced helplessly at her voice recorder. There was no way she wanted audio from the last minute playing in court. "Ms. Williams, I'd appreciate it if we could focus on taking your statement. Your testimony could be very important to finding the person who did this to your neighbor. What you or I feel about it really doesn't matter compared to that, does it?"

Marleen gave a sharp nod, leading with her chin, lowering her hands into her lap.

Nechama stopped her current recording and queued up a new one. It felt unethical to erase the embarrassing one, but she could try to set things up so it was easy not to play it in court. She kept her eyes off Marleen altogether, choosing a spot in the middle of the table. Her left breast felt like Marleen had burned it. She was so aroused, her nipple almost stung. She took a deep breath. "Now, I think we're going to need to start over."

To read more, check out Lesbian Cops.

Music (Lesbian Cops Edition): "Raised to Be Lowered" by Saul Williams

"To rise above hatred to love through seeming contradiction. To seldom take a side and learn to complement the friction. To bring about the change within that we can't live without." -- Saul Williams

When I write a story, I always start by choosing the music. For "A Prayer Before Bed," I knew I needed rage and urgency, with just a glimmer of hope. I jumped around a bit while I was writing, but Saul Williams' "Raised to Be Lowered" sums it up pretty well.

Nechama and Marleen are both walking wounded, they're both tougher than seems possible, and they're both softer than seems possible. They both want a better world that seems out of reach. They might both ask this question: "Was I raised to be lowered?"

But despite all the anger and fear and suspicion that stand between them, they manage to find redemption in each other's arms, at least for a moment.

Lesbian Cops Blog Tour: End of the Line

And here we come to the last stop on the Lesbian Cops blog tour, and I find myself wondering if I'm able to sum this up. This anthology has so much range. It's hot, it's sweet, it's poignant, it pushes boundaries in all directions. I hope you take the time to check out the book, and what the writers have to say about their stories.

I love writing and reading erotica for its honesty--not just about how it feels good when you do that with your tongue (though it does, and it's damn good to be able to say so). In sex, we are stripped bare literally and figuratively, and I believe that sex shows so much about people.

When I began writing erotica, I worried that it would start to feel mechanical, or that it would make sex seem mechanical to me. In fact, my whole world came to life. I found that I loved sex scenes for the characterization. In real life, I often wonder what it would be like to fuck this or that person. There's a reason that some editions of the Bible refer to sex with the euphemism "knowing." I love Sacchi Green's editing because she really captures this--the sex in Lesbian Cops shows so many aspects of human nature.

And she trusted me to show a dark one.

My first published piece of erotica was a simple lesbian fantasy--cunnilingus for a really, really long time could be the tag line. But very soon I found that writing about sex unlocked a lot more in me. If I could tell the truth--if I could say "fuck" and "pussy" and "cunt"--then there was a whole lot more truth ready to come out. Don't get me wrong--I like my erotica hot, and I try to write it that way. But I also find myself using erotica to write about grief and addiction and abuse, and all kinds of things I was never brave enough to write about before.

In my story in Lesbian Cops, called "A Prayer Before Bed," I write about murder.

In September 2009, I had a profound and terrible experience that is still coming out in my writing. It's very much behind this story. Here, I'm writing about how people deal with the aftermath of murder.

The main characters of "A Prayer Before Bed" are Nechama, a cop, and Marleen, witness to a terrible crime. They have a lot in common, but they perceive each other as on opposite "sides." When I was writing this, I thought a lot about how that's often the case with cops. I respect what police officers do very much, but to be honest I grew up in a house where it was definitely not a good thing to see a cop at the door, and they did come sometimes. Cops were the enemy, even if they were struggling with the same issues we were. There's a lot of hostility and suspicion dividing Marleen and Nechama, and a lot of pain.

Here's where the miracle of sex comes in. Sex is this powerful physical urge that can accomplish what seems to be impossible so much of the time: for a moment, sex allows one person to reach inside another. Nechama and Marleen aren't sweet with each other, but they need each other desperately, and the heat is in that need. That's the side of sex that I'm writing about, and I'm grateful to Sacchi for choosing my story despite its difficult subject matter.

Since I'm the last stop of the blog tour, I wanted to make things a little special. You'll see a few more posts throughout the day. At the end, I'll put up a surprise. Thanks for reading!

Monday, April 11, 2011

Music Mondays: "I Can't Quit You Baby" by Otis Rush

"Well, I can't quit you, baby, but I've got to put you down for awhile." -- Otis Rush

I've got that one lover who got away, the one I tried it with too many times, the one I used to do anything to get alone with. This is the person I knew better than to see again, but whose calls still made my heart pound.

When I used to leave, and when we used to say it was over, for a long time I think neither of us believed that it was true. I remember driving away once and "I Can't Quit You Baby" by Otis Rush came on. It was exactly what I felt. I couldn't go through it anymore with this lover right then, but I knew I'd be back.

Ever since then, this song has symbolized that special erotic insanity that comes over people sometimes, when we act out of passion without any sense of the consequences.

There's another version of the song that I like better than the one I linked, but I have it on some mysterious mix tape and can't figure out where it's from. The old blues versions are far superior to the Led Zeppelin version, I have to say. The Led Zeppelin version feels flat and passionless to me when I listen to it after Otis Rush.

As a side note, in the video I linked, look at how entirely white the audience is--it's crazy.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011


My story, "Begging," went up last night on Every Night Erotica:

“No,” Christine sobbed. “It’s– Karl, I need you.”

“Need me to do what?” He still sounded alarmed.

“I just need you. Inside me. It’s been so long.”

“Jesus. You’re crying.”

“I’m sorry. It’s stupid.” Shame filled Christine. Never in her wildest dreams had she pictured herself making a call like this, begging a man for sex.

Visit the site to read the rest of the story!

Monday, April 4, 2011

Music Mondays: "Leather" by Tori Amos

"I can scream as loud as your last one, but I can't claim innocence." -- Tori Amos

A lot of my erotica comes out much darker than I mean it to, and I think some of it's that once I got under cover of a pseudonym, I started to tell the truth and the whole truth about what I know about sex, and, more importantly, people. I'm very inspired and affected by music, and I've wanted for a while to highlight some of the songs that I love, that told the truth to me, and that pushed or comforted me.

It's hard to think of a better way to start than with Tori Amos's incredible Leather, off the Little Earthquakes album. The song mixes vulnerability and aggression and stretches it to the breaking point. Give it a listen, and look for more posts on sexy music coming up in the future.

I'm borrowing Twitter's "Music Mondays" hashtag for these, since I figured everyone needs music to start the work week.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Lesbian Cops is out--and a blog tour!

My new story, "A Prayer Before Bed," is out in Sacchi Green's new anthology Lesbian Cops. I love Green's editing style--hot stories with a lot of range. She was kind enough to accept a very dark story from me, seeing the redemption hidden in the rage and despair (and, of course, the sex).

To get the word out about the book, she's also got a blog tour going (it's actually in progress already). You can read more about the story behind the book from Sacchi and many of the other authors (and, at the very end, from me). Where the posts are up already, I've linked directly to them, and where they're forthcoming, I've linked to the sites where you can find them. Please check it out:

March 31 - Sacchi Green Interview:

April 1 - JL Merrow:

April 2 - Jove Belle:

April 3 - Delilah Devlin:

April 4 - R. G. Emanuelle:

April 5 - Andrea Dale:

April 6 - Kenzie Matthews:

April 7 - Ily Goyanes:

April 8 - Cheyenne Blue:

April 9 - Evan Mora:

April 10 - J.N. Gallagher:

April 11 - Liz Coldwell:

April 12 - Teresa Noelle Roberts:

April 13 - Lynn Mixon:

April 14 - RV Raiment:

April 15 - me, right here

I'll have to come up with something good to celebrate the end of the party. Please check out the book, and be well!